There are no secrets on the Internet.

I know that no one is going to look at all of the links on this website.  But look long enough to understand that nothing you can do will keep you anonymous unless you use the Tails operating system, and even then there isn’t much that anyone can’t find out in a few seconds.

https://www.browserleaks.com

So, given that you can have no secrets, the best remaining choice is not to look like you have any secrets.  Just get lost in the crowd. Use steganography to send secret messages in innocuous pictures.  Do you have any nude pictures of your girlfriend?  Do you want some?  Look at the fish I caught.  Who knew it swallowed all of the secret submarine plans?  Hillary Clinton had all of the technology of the United States Government behind her and she didn’t bother to use it – and what happened to her?  Why nothing.  She’s too big to fail.

Seriously, though who is going to actually sneak around tracking you?  With YOUR money? Your jealous boyfriend/girlfriend.  Because they think you are getting something they aren’t.  Why don’t all of you pick your gender assignment for the evening, lock yourselves into a Vegas party house and just go home with whoever you wake up with in the morning.

Insofar as government agencies following you and listening to your calls. no one gives a shit and if they did, they’d be following the wrong person anyway.  The employees at the Alphabet agencies are doing their jobs as well as everyone else in the country does theirs, which means they are doing nothing.  We have nothing to worry about and the bad guys have nothing to worry about.

Remember that $150k you borrowed to finish college?  That Master of Arts degree taught you to say “Do you want fries with that?”  And you can’t get a job as an art teacher, so you’ll be paying it off shagging your ass on the corner or hustling secrets from the geek that works at NSA.  Or, if you don’t want to work, you can deal drugs.

Forget about your phone.  It’s just a fancy walkie-talkie.  Anyone can listen to it.  Have you tried to call me lately?  It doesn’t matter.  I didn’t answer.

Good Morning, America.  How are you?

 

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